good evening. or ops its morning

still dark outside. time is 9:22. but its getting ligther now. i drink black coffee because milk was gone bad. at 13:00 i must be somewhere, then after it i go buy milk + bread. i still have my christmas foods, but at mornings cant eat so heavy foods, so need bread too. my 3kg ham is half eaten. i put the rest in slices and in freezer, so its not getting bad. 2 days the ham steak was on balcony, but i dont dare to keep it dare 3rd day. ham became good (as i did it first time in my life), + other foods too became good. im proud of my self :)

christmas generally went nice and i got good presents which i get use for. not very expensive, but very useful anyway. for example i got a tools pack. good. now i dont need to borrow them from my mom anymore :D (screwdrivers with many plugs in, pliers, and so on).

father will come today or tomorrow to visit us. now its good time because youngest brother from tallinn is also here now.

its snowing outside. snowing started in christmas day. i was excited of it if we will have black christmas, but then suddenly started to snow. jeee.. i have yet not lived a black christmas in my life. atleast i cant remember a one. maybe in stockholm was black christmas when i was small. idk. but in finland + norway never had. because i have always lived enough north. kajaani is exactly in the limit where use to be snow, but if go 100km souther, then black christmas is normal. good, so i will never move souther of kajaani >:D hih.

i woke early today even i have holiday, but its because i need to wake up properly, before im able to take a shower. i really hate morning showers. water feel disgusting if blood circulation is not normal. thats why need time to wake up and get body in balance before can go in shower. its also because i always take so long + hot showers, that i feel almost sick after it. heart biting hardly and dizziness etc. high bloodpressure maybe if is long times in hot shower.

i removed the christmas calender number sticker from my kitchen window yesterday by hard work. it didnt almost get off, but then i googled little, and used soap water + cheese cutter to remove it :D took 25 mins to get it off -.- never again. if in next year they ask me to participate in christmas calender, i will politely say no. was so annoying to remove the sticker -.-...     yes, we had christmas calender system at this house. every window had to put big number sticker, and in certain day decorate the window with anything as wanted. i was number 20.

i dont yet know what i will do in the new year night. things will go impulsively just. better not do plans, because they always fail (in my case). maybe im with mom then, or then im with friends. will see. fireworks i will not buy. no money. didnt buy in last year either. but dont need to, because here in the centrum will be nice fireworks, launched by city government. i go watch them then maybe.

 '

also, finland will start the 100-years anniversary at 1.1.17. whole the year will be jubilee year then. and finally 100 - years in 6.12.17. i already imagine how coffee packs and stuff will wear finland flags whole the next year. kraah.

in the last month al putino said "we must analyze the 1917 happenings again properly" :D. why he tell this exactly now when finland is going to celebrate its 100-year. suspectous :D

in my craziest imagination i already fear, that putin will not give us the 100 years, but attack us before 6.12.17 :D:D:D. ahhaha.. ok better not joke and laugh, or carma will make it true :)

time is 9:43 now. 20 mins spent for this text now. help help. f6.

because need sometimes stop writing and think what to write. writing in it self goes fast ofcourse. i mean of course. i mean ofcourse. im stubborn so i write in my ways without spaces in between. many words i write together, even i know i should write them separated. but njet problem da da da problem. harashoooo. njet ponemaju i snaju. ya khochu cigaret. so baj for ever. i mean for little time. and happy last year and good easter etc if i dont anymore update this blog for this year. of me can never know. i too dont know my self. not easy to be gemini in horoscope. like 2 persons. other part want this, and second part another. hoooooooooohohoohohohoh. thats why too i dont like to do faraway plans, because i can suddenly change mind. better then go impulsively by feeling as then feel. follow intuitions then just. ascendant scorpio dont make things any easier. scorpio + gemini are full opposite to each others, so i live always like in a crossfire and have big fights inside me :D gemini is sensible, scorpio goes by emotions. aa, and because my mercury + mars is in the cancer, so more emotions controlling me. mercury is planet of communication + intelligence + business etc. and mars is planet of action and energy. mars in cancer is a bit bad , when do actions by emotions + inspirations. mräääh.. nonii, meen tupakille---->

huomenna on jouluaatto

I woke up 30 mins before alarm clock, because the hairy alarm clock with 4 legs + 1 tail decided to wake me up 05:55 or something. then at 6 i made coffee.

today is short work day, 10:45 ending. some of us will be going to eat lunch at 11 in a restaurant that is in the another side of city. because lunch at downstairs is not available for us today, there is some event for other ppl, so we cant go there.

after lunch i will buy the last things from the store, then start to cook some christmas food stuff. (first time in my life i do my own christmas foods, help help.. ) :D. because we meet with family 25th dec, so 24th i will be alone. or almost alone, little brother will come to me tomorrow evening. some of family members are busy 24th, thats why we move the celebration to next day.

first i protested for this, that are we reallllly going to move the christmas eve to next day, but now its fine, because bro will come to me :). dont need to be full alone.

this year christmas i even sent cards to few ppl :) 

difficult to focus in this writing because ugly music playing of speakers. and 1 of speaker is 1 m near me. arrrhh.. some awkward and ugly christmas songs. i like old traditional christmas songs better than some modern sabotaged shitt songs, and the singers doesnt even have beautiful voice.

hmmmmsss hmm..

what will i write now. my life is so calm and boring that there is nothing interesting to tell. hmmmmmmmmmmmm. also im shy to write too random things. 1 year ago i was more brave. i want back that feeling, to just write anything and not shame.

ok i try. 

jåååh.. more money came today. need to pay rent soon when inspiration comes. nowadays i pay bills with phone just, because in pc if pay, need to use annoying key lists. in phone i have applications for it, just 1-2 click and done.

water bill came yesterday, and the due date is 30.12. really? they couldnt send the bill little earlier? now is no time to prepare for pay it.. goes to next month. but np, they will not blame if pay it little late.

yesterday happened a small accident with my computer. i explained about it already in instagram but i explain again because i want to write something to spend this work day faster :D so. in morning when i drank coffee and read news as usual, then my cat messed around there and here and ran like crazy, and in 1 moment ran and crashed at my pc :O
fool cat.. and pc shaked a lot ofcourse. pc then restarted it self and went in windows recovery error mode, where need to choose if go to safe mode or directly to windows. i couldnt even press anything, keyboard didnt work. then it automatically after 20 sec went to windows. but never launched to windows, but went in some black screen just and pc was thinking there long times. i shut down pc and checked that all wires are connected. then launched pc again, again same thing, black screen and not going to windows.
then i shut down pc again and took wires of hard discs and connected again. and pc on. no result. then the time was already too much, had to go to work. i quickly just took both hard discs off and put them in my backpack and walked to work with them, then i tested hdd's here in workplace in any random pc. hard discs worked normal. then i asked if someone of work mates can drive me to my home so that i catch my computer with me. then i got someone to drive and we got pc here. then we deep cleaned with with air pressure tools + vacuumcleaner and put hdd's on place. and launched pc. worked normal o.O
then rest of the day i used my pc here at work :D shhhhshsh.. dont tell anyone, but i played games just and read news and relaxed just :))  because here was nothing else to do..

i sent email to school few days ago. because i need answers to some questions.
i first analyze all possible things, before i decide if i want to go study there or not :P

its ict-sector im interested of. the ict sector was before it-sector, but its changed to ict-sector nowdays. there is more electricity missions, than was before. i tried IT-sector in 2005, but then i was young and fool + restless, so i found it too boring, so i jumped to business administration sector, and was there 6 months, but i left it too. then was problems with eczema, that i had to leave. now im ready to try school again, when health is again in somehow control + more stabler than 10 y ago. anyway im not interested to continue the business sector where i left it, i like more to do things with pc, so i want to head to it-sector. + because i already know so much basics about computers, so it would be easy start for me there. also for my own good, i want to become better with computer. a freak >:D
and then i will hack everyone and etc. ok joke joke xD

huomenta

piti just hakia ruokalippu tuolta infosta, ku 11 aikkaa me saahaan ilmanen jouluruoka tuolla alakerran syöttölässä. kahvitauon jäläkkee lähen cittariin ostammaa ruokkaa tuonne kanttiinaan. ne laittaa aina minut ostoksille ku oon kokenu ja ollu kauan jo tässä talossa.

en pysty enää autolla ajaa ku silmälasit on hukassa :-/ kämppä on käännetty ylösalaisin muutaman kerran eikä löydy. varmasti tippunu johonki kadulle tai jonnekki. vois ehkä poliisiasemaltaki käyä kyselemässä. jos jaksan, nii heti töitten jälkee. nyt ku oon pyörällä liikenteessä. tulin siks pyörällä ku meinasin myöhästyä, ei ois mitenkää kävellen kerinny ajoissa. yleensä näin talvella tykkään mielummin kävellä. ku pyöräs meinaa jarrut jäätyä ja vaihteet jos kovat pakkaset, nii ei voi ees ajaa sillä.

oon miettiny et jos lähtis opiskelee. ICT-asentajaksi. tutkinu + miettiny 2 viikkoo nyt. vielä on epäselvää et pääseekö sinne aikuispuolen kautta. vai pitääkö mennä niitten teinien sekaan opiskelee ensi syksynä. anyway pitäs kohta tietää varmaksi et haluunko opiskelee, koska yhteishaku on keväällä. ja jos aikuispuoli, nii eikös niillä ala jo tammikuussa :S. kiire tullee..

laitoin eilen joulukoristeet. vihdoinki. pitäs viel käyä tokmannista ostaa toinen ledivalo-sarja ja sit tarvin 3m pitkän jatkoroikan. sitte pitäs imuroija kämppä. en oo jaksanu pitkää aikaa imuroija. vähä muut asiat kiinnostanu viime aikoina, nii ei oo ollu "aikaa" siivota :D

huomenna mennää joutenlammelle syömään. ensi on se leffa, mut otin vapauden siitä tietystä syystä, nii meen suoraan vaa linkkuun sit ja ootan niitä muita et ne tullee sieltä leffasta. nii ja huomenna loppuu jo aikasemmin. yeah..

kauhia ku tärissee oikea käsi. nälkä on. söin vaa jotai ananasta aamupalaksi purkista :D ja 2 kuppia kahavia. ei maistu leipä niin aikaisin aamulla. yök.

3D-tulostin tulostaa tossa vieressä ja tekee kummallisia ufo ääniä. se tekkee piparimuotteja.
tai ainakin yrittää tehä :D ku tuossa tulostimessa on ollu paljon ongelmia.

stressaa ku pitäs joululahjojaki ostaa. ei oo rahhaa oikee.. no jotain halpaa voi ostaa.
en kyl tiiä yhtää et mitä ostan kellekki. ja ostan vaa omille perheenjäsenille. kaverit ei oota lahjoja, ku osa niistä itekkää ei aijo ostaa. hyvä vaa nii säästyy rahaa.

mummolle pitäs stevia suklaata löytää tuolta cittarista, äiti aikoo lähettää sille. yritin jo eilen löytää mut en nähny missää. pitäs varmaa kysyä henkilökunnalta että missä ne on.
kiire ois löytää koska pitäs keretä lähettää ruotsiin ne. hmm pitäs kortti ostaa myös.
meinasin ensin että poltan musiikkia cd-levylle ja lähetän mummolle, mut varmaan se idea jää nyt. tai en tiiä. pitää kattoa.

ärsyttää ku ykski tyyppi kokoaja harvemmin ja harvemmin tulee onlineen. vissii kiireinen elämä. ja jos ymmärsin oikein, nii se opiskelee vielä työn lisäksi. huoh -.-
tylsäksi menny koko juttu. en tiiä mitä tekis. ehkä parempi vaa unohtaa se nyt lopullisesti.
(helpommin sanottu ku tehty).

joo-o. ei kiinnosta kirjottaa enempää. mräyhh. pitää käydä vessassa ja sit kääriä rööki. kohta on kahvitauko.

now i will read this text in english at google translator, and laugh my self to death :D
#silly :)

------

my dialect words: (first word is my dialect, second is correct)

ku, koska = because, than, when
kämppä= flat
jäläkkee, jälkeen= after
aikkaa, aikaan= time
saahaan, saadaan= get
pitäs, pitäisi= have to
hyvä vaa= its only good
tullee, tulee= coming
tekkee, tekee= making
imuroija, imuroida= vacuumclean
käyä, käydä= visit
et, että= that. but että can be used in other cases too, which need different kind english word/sentence
nii, niin= so
oo, ole= is, have, staying ---> ei oo= dont have, is not. do you have smoke? - ei oo, dont have. is the cat under bed? - ei oo, is not. --> oo siinä= stay there.
meen, menen= going
rahhaa, rahaa=money
ois, olisi= would be
tiiä, tiedä= know
sit, sitten= then
oon, olen= i am
ees, edes= even
tärissee, tärisee= shaking
mut, mutta= but
ykski, yksikin= that (one)
siks, siksi= therefor, thats why, in some case "because"
mennää, mennään= we go
jos= if
ootan, odotan= im waiting
just, justiin, justiinsa,= just, atm, right now, freshly, exactly, right, only, (just have many meanings)..
juuri is family to word just.
juuri= same as just, but juuri also means root.
punajuuri= beetroot
puna, punainen= red
hakia, hakea= to get
piti= had to
tuolta= from there, beyond there
tuolla= there (further away)
tuossa= there (closer away, intensive)
tässä= right here (very close, more intensive, detailed)
täällä= here

mää, mä, mie, minä, = I, me
sää, sä, nää, nä, sie, sinä= you (1 person)
te= you (all), or if talk to elderly/respectful person then its polite to say te.
pijä, pidä= keep, hold. --> ei se pijä paikkaasa, ei se pidä paikkaansa= its not holding the place (its not true).
ookko, ootko, oot, oletko= do (you), are (you)
oonko, olenko= am I    (not always necessary to use I (minä) word if feel lazy, will be understood, because oonko, olenko already is talking about "me").

(oonko tyhmä= am i stupid,
oonko mää tyhmä= am i stupid)   both choices are ok.

ookkonää tyhymä?= are you stupid?
oletko sinä tyhmä?= -||-
oot sie tyhmä?
ootko sää tyhmä?

same thing with ootko,oot, oletko, ookko. can  use alone like that without using you word, if want to talk in simple/lazy way. because actually "oot, olet" beginning already is talking about you(1 person).

if want to talk to "you all" or respectful human, then words become longer:
ootteko, oletteko, oletteko te = are you(all)


pöljä, hölmö= fool
vammane, vammainen= retard, handicapped
kusipää= pisshead (bastard, cunt, twat)
paskiainen= shitthead or smth :D

stronger ugly words i will not teach.. :D


ok finnish dialect lesson is over for today. the teacher will be busy with another things now.
have a nice day. hyvää päivän jatkoa!  jatkoa= continuation

hui hai

i skip work today because allergy reaction in face + eyes :-/ idk what happens to me. could it be stem renu which i react to? because i have not eaten anything unhealthy in few days etc.
i will keep pause of stem renu pills for few days and start again when feel good.

in evening is housewarming "party" at marika's new home, i maybe go there. if i feel better in my face :D eyes looks like shit -.- need to avoid salted food today and drink a lot of water so swelling around eyes  and redness + burning in face calms down. in front neck is nice soar because scratched it to bloods during sleeping. i slept balcony door little bit open last night because was so warm here. its some 0 c outside. been for 1-2 days. snows are melting..  i need a shovel because its annoying how its snowing directly to my balcony. i hope they melt away now because soon will come cold again. looked for a  small metal shovel from shop yesterday but didnt find. there was only big ones. hm.

maybe at benzine stations they sell mini shovels. that kind what you can have in a car. small metal one. im spending this morning by watching youtube videos just. and drank 2 cup of coffee. coffee smoke coffee smoke. maybe need to do something sensible too. clean kitchen or smth. there are much dirty dishes :D need put them in machine. 

ios 10.1.1 sucks. why did i install it -.- older ios was better.

time is 9:41. i continue this text later. because nothing more to say right now.

9:47 dishes in machine now. need to wash 2 rounds because was not space for all. cooking pan's take all space -.- im envious to them who have normal big machine. i have only the half size :D but no space in kitchen for big one. so need to be happy that even have some kind of machine. and dont need to wash with hands and get poisoned of liquid soap. when i washed dishes, the soap liquid fog came up to face and made much itching + ofcourse hands itched and dryed too. no matter if used gloves, hands itched still. happy that that times are history..  ye, marika and bf found new home now in a good place. (funny place), but nothing more about that :D:D: because dangerous if some certain ppl read this text so i dont want to make problem :D

i have strange economic situation now because i got double benefit money for same month, and because i want to be honest, so i of course called there and asked how come i got so much money, and how did they calculate it etc. but the woman said all is correct and calculated right, and i claimed with her many mins and explained my last month incomings, etc + coming incomings + she knew too, how much i got and will get in next months, still she said all is right. i dont understand at all. now i have 500e extra even i feel its not right. im afraid to spend that 500e, so i moved them in safe and i will try to claim about it again in january + reguest them to check calculations if it still looks weird how i have so much money. lol.. if in january they still say that its correct, then i will go shoppiiiing :D but im 90% sure something is not right. better let the time go and see what happens.

mm.. ye. i go to smoke because so warm here. and then i continue with youtube videos. addicted.com.

godei

i just drove led lights to light factory. in the car was bad wheels, was disgusting to drive on snow -.-. waiting for coffee break now. gluuuug glug glug. next weekend will be long, because we have 5th and 6th day free. uraaaaaaaaaaa.

yesterday i found something strong washing liquid which is meant exactly for sofa and exactly for cat pee :D. i first test that liquid in invisible place of sofa, to see if textile damages or changes color, before i will really use it on the seats. hope its good and will work..

costed 15e. then dont need to bring sofa seats to wash, if this liquid will work.

i sent email to 1 certain magazine company and asked if i can go work there as a trainee. in january i must out of this building.. im specially seeking workplace that is close to my home, so i dont need to walk long :D not fun in -20c to cycle to other side of city. aha coffee now. brb

13:11 plasters in hand are wet because i washed hands. lazy to change plasters.

outside started to rain. soon will be slipperyyyy... here is 30cm snow now. in night came much. (1.12 edit: there came more snow yesterday, and more is coming :D)

when is much snow, i walk to work then. nonsense come with bike then, + because this workplace is so close to me. 7-10 mins walk. in friday evening i maybe go eat christmas food with mom to some place. nam nam. then next christmas food will be 15th and 16th december. and 24th. 15, 16 will be due the work. 15th here in workplace, and 16th we go watch some movie and after it with bus driver somewhere out of city to some idk place and eat there. i maybe skip the movie. and go directly to bus just. in last year i did same. 

need to pack 500 x 60 cm led lights from tomorrow to 9.12. (5th and 6th dec is free), so will be much work. because first need to make the light boxes before can pack them. i need fast get the soars in fingers to be fixed, so can work :D with 1000 plaster in every finger will not be fun when pack lights. soars came when i ate candies and chips in last week -.- now i eat healthy again. 

feeling hungry a bit because in restaurant was some fish soup which i couldnt eat. so i ate my own foods. some random indian rice-chicken thing, which i bought from shop, warmed it in micro oven. was not so tasty :D too much strange spices.

after work i need to ask if mother can drive me to one office. need bring some papers there. and also need go to apotecary to buy asthma medicines.

i have annoying tic in left eye corner. its been there few days now. grr...

and 1 week ago it was in mouth corner. now it moved to eye. i eat enough magnesium, b vitamine and so on, so its not lack of any mineral. idk what it is then.

what if i sell my piano, so i can buy the graphic card >:D. i have not played with my piano in long times. somehow not had inspiration. hooohoho.. never never will sell it.

now i go continue to fill my linkedin profile. just for fun filling it, because bored. hei. 

any title

tipsu is washing her self and i washed some flower buckets and other trash buckets with hard work in the bathroom with small shower, soap liquid and brush. im not at work today because thats why. ahahahha.. not your business. >:D. ok skin problems just. nothing else dangerous.

aaand.. yes i have not eaten any breakfast yet and i woke 6:30, and time is now 10:42.
i will go to shop before 14:00, because then all teens are there, their school finish at that times. my moneys are very in end, so i need to pay in complicated ways at cassa, so i dont want any teens there starring at me how i pay :D yes yes im shy, when need to do something awkward. ouuh tlph ringing. sec. ok done. heh..

tomorrow will come money, but i need some things today. i had savings for graphic card, but because salary day moved 10 days to other day, i had to live with this savings moneys :(. and now that moneys are gone, rest of coins will be finished today :D
gg graphic card then. cant play fs17 anymore then. i can wait the another rich days looooooooong.  because christmas coming and need waste moneys in gifts.

and tipsu will eat more money in near future. i need to bring sofa seats to professional wash, and its not cheap. then i need to bring her to doctor perhaps. but i yet follow situation if her heat will stop or not. if it will continue more further, need go to doctor and either get the pills, or castrate her. i called to vet 2 week ago and asked if they can write to me pills recipe for her, due the tlph. but they said they dont nowadays anymore give prevention pills to cats so easily, (because they are dangerous or smth). so they want to meet tipsu first to analyze her, before they decide if they give pills or not. will become expensiveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.... grrrr. she has been in heat 6 times now in this autumn/winter, but had ofcourse 1 weeks pauses in between each heat. but still im worried because heat is so long. was never before so long :O. and she have started new hobby due the heat, marking places (soft places) with pee. and sofa was the biggest target. i have tried to wash it so good as just can, with several liquids, but smell doesnt go away. now sofa is covered with things for many week, because cant leave sofa "open", or she will mark there when i dont notice. now im afraid of my bed, that she will mark there too. i put empty pizza boxes to cover bed :D (i knew that i will get use of them someday) :D everytime when i leave home, or if i even go to shower, i must cover bed for that time too. for mystical reasons i have not invited guests to my home in long time :D because they cant sit comfortable here :P

vet doctor tought that i will give everyday 1 pill to her. but i tried to say, that i dont give so often, but 1 time a week. because 1 pill a week will stop her heat. i have experience of it before. when we lived in norway, i had pills for her there, and when she got heat, i gave just 1 pill. and heat stopped after 2 days. cant be so dangerous. but vet doc does not believe me i think. she think i will give everyday. they only want money, thats why they request me to visit there with cat. visiting will cost 50e. and if they write the pills recipe, medicines will cost 10-20e. so, can guess i dont so easily wanna go there.. i will yet follow situation and look if she calms down. i dont have so big moneys in december, when need to buy other things too + wash sofa.

11:02. i need breakfast now. stomach is aching because of the hunger.

11:06  nam rye bread with salami sausage and cheese and grass onion. or grassonion. i dont know how in english need to write some words, if together or not. because in finnish this kind of 2 words combinations need to be together, but in english they often need to be separated. confusing.

in morning i got allergy attack of honey o.O. i have eaten that same honey (organic) millions times before, so idk why suddenly now got reaction of it. maybe some change in the product? left side lip started to get swollen, and some red spots came near mouth :D. but now all is normal. also skin itched much in morning, but its another history.

in friday i compared in some application in internet for power companys prices. and found some other company which have 0e basic fee, and sale price much cheaper than in my current power company was. in current was 8.80e basic fee, and sale price much higher. i ofcourse changed to the cheapest one, and took 12 months contract. could take 24 months too, but i specially took 12 months, so that i can again compare prices, and select cheaper one, when 12 months gone. >:D.  in this + last month i have been thinking a lot of my money outgoings, and shut down many things which steal moneys for nothing from me. closed 1 bank. closed donald duck ordering, (can loan them from library), closed 2nd tlphs operator. because i didnt anymore use it, and for nothing goes money for it -.- . and now changed power company to cheaper one. need yet think what other stuff i can change or close, to win money.. vitamines + minerals that i need every month, eat a lof of money. health cost.. but so will cost doctor visits too and medicines.. better then put moneys in organic healthy stuff, instead of synthetical poisons , which make in longer sight only more harm. and then more problems + sicknesses come. 

father bought to me for advantage christmas gift Stem Renu health product. its some very new product that came now to finland markets, 2 months ago. its one kind of fountain of youth product. that will renew stem cells and activate them to repair body and renew organism system in body. in that way human will age slower., also when it renew stem cells, it can fix infected organs in the body. we humans get fast old because of the stem cells that are slowing down and dont renew anymore. or like that i understood, when listened to their webinar.

stem renu's are very expensive capsules, but if they work, and are not bullshitt, then will be cool :). they should come in post in this week.
the ingredients in stem renu are interesting, for example in it is cartilage of shark :)

im smoking some old dry smoke, because the small amount of fresh tubacco i have left, i will save to work. because in work will be shameful to roll smoke of dryed smoke, and it mess all places when it run out of cigarette :D need only survive today, then tomorrow i can buy aaaaaaaaaallllllll what i wantt...or .. first need to pay rent and visit apotecary, and pay tlph bill and etc. then can waste to what want. 30th november should also come money. and 1.12 will come housing benefit. 29, 30, 1.12   everyday will come money after today :d. hihi...

weather got cold again and its some 20cm snow in my city now. snows came few days ago.

time is 11:35. i go put dishes in machine. later in evening i will vacuumclean. i will not now vacuumclean yet because i want go to shop without sweating. because in evening i go to shower, so better vacuumclean then before shower.

just a normal day in timestamps. numerologia day 3.

6:30 - alarm clock dared to wake me up. he/she should be ashamed..
6:44 - i enjoy this coffee. throat is aching when i swallow. but coffee helps.
6:55 - toilet
6:56 - going to morning smoke
7:00 - back in. brushed snow on the balcony. its snowing outside.
7:02 - getting more coffee and surfing on the internet.
7:23 - preparing for work day; brushing hair, washing face, putting creme to face, changing clothes, brushing teetch. putting deodorant.
7:35 - making bed and taking vitamines + infection preventing asthma medicine.
7:38 - making sandwich for work.
7:40 - rolling smoke + packing backpack
7:41 - checking temperature from google --> there is -1. ok.
7:42 - putting out clothes on and visiting toilet.
7:46 - pc off-----> and going to walk to work + smoke while walking.
7:56 - arrived work place.
8:02 - going to wash this keyboard + mouse. disgusting fatty. someone stole my yesterdays pc, now need to use another.

8:07 - ujeee.. now is better. other ppl maybe watched confused when i washed these :D
09:00 - coffee time. and ate the sandwich. and smoked. outside still snowing.
11:00 - lunch + smoke
13:00 - coffee + smoke

14:00 - left from work. and bought smoke from grocery. there needed to wait long time because some grandmothers bought + checked their raffle tickets.

14:13 - arrived home. and immediately i ate some sandwich, or half of it, then brushed teeth, drank little water, visited toilet. and hurry out again. took bicycle from the basement and cycled to one place, there needed to be 14:30. there i slept on the neurosonic chair for 20 mins + took new acupuncture magnet to behind ear. snow beginning to melt, so there is a bit slippery now.

15:20 - i left from that place, and went to siwa to buy thin sausages and cherry tomatoes + small geisha chokolate also accidentally jumped in my basket of the shelf. and cucumber also i bought. siwa shops will be closing and go to history. centrum siwa is maybe the only one that is yet left, but time question when will they also close.. many ex-siwa grocerys will be replaced with K-market. k-market is cheaper.. so its ok. but for nostalgic reason its a bit sad that siwa's will end.

15:32 - arrived home
15:37 - smoke-->
15:39 - back in and sitting on the pc now just and listening music. its raining outside lightly.

15:52 - chest aching, need to take magnesium + calsium. this problem been 1 month now, maybe stress. because 1 month had dark eyebags too, even i sleep enough etc.. also heart jumping heavily sometimes for 1 month time.

15:57 - again to smoke because nervous + need cold air. in room is too warm. nervous + too warm = i start to scratch everywhere. only cold air helps then.

15:59 - smoked just half cig. now need to change relaxing home clothes + go rest in bed with phone.

16:26 - feeling tired but need to keep on move, so i go put dirty dishes in machine. + make coffee. yawn.

16:38 - dishes are happily bathing in the machine  + coffee is soon ready.

16:40 - geisha chocolate + coffee. + surfing on the internet. i really hate THE word. thats why i often avoid of using it because annoying word just. only then use when its very necessary.

16:42 - or yes, i will read novells. i today saved a novell forum link to my fb (it shows there only to me) :D. i often save important links like that in my fb wall, so i later get them. kraa.

16:45 - ok the (main) link is not secret. its www.finfanfun.fi. but more spesific url i dont give :D anyways,  there are millions of (fic) novells. slurps <3. 2-3 days been total addicted and reading there.

16:49 - ok silencio, need focus and read. shhh. or ops need first toilet. because its annoying to go to toilet middle of reading when focus. so need go before even start.

16:51. - ok. and hmm.. actually need smoke too. brb.
16:53 - tipsu also came to smoke with me. now i will go to utopic world and read--->
18:10 - now need break. eyes hurt. smoke------>
18:14 - shower needed. but need to wait little bit, because after smoke cant immediately go, 
water will otherwise feel disgusting. 

18:22 - trash bags switched. need to remember to bring trash out tomorrow morning..
18:26 - need to close eyes for 5-10 mins. feeling dizzy + heart beating strongly. because been reading text from screen whole day.

18:34 - shower--->
19:21 - oho.. i was long time there. (shaved + cut nails) xD..
19:27 - fresh air needed (trought filter). air at outside is too fresh for my lungs, so need filter. also because i have asthma, so cant know what poisons i can breath if breath without filter. now a days cant trust anywhere anymore in the air. too much pollutant.. in 60's when i was a young girl, then air was very clean.

19:33 - need to close washmachine faucet and open machine door, so dishes get air. too lazy to empty machine now. i will do that tomorrow. or after tomorrow. or in the next year. if i live so long. hmms. also need to make food. but need to wait for inspiration, so i continue read novells a bit.

19:41 - now i go put french fries + sausages in oven--->
19:50 - done. and needed to wash spatula. because was not space in the wash machine for it :D. aa, and also i rinsed the cherry tomatoes. now i continue reading. i have tried to search e-books from internet, but if they are free (e-library or shop), they are some bad/boring books, or then, if i find any good ones, they cost very much. e-books cost more than normal books :-/.
19:59 - tuo yx tuli tonne pelijuttuun just. se on nyt viimepäivinä tullu tosi myöhään sinne.
20:09 - now i will eat. french fries, sausages, cucumber, tomatoes, garlic mayonese and ketchup. (spices; blackpepper, cayennepepper + salt). and i will continue reading. no energy + interest to play any games today.
20:45 - i just calculated with ctrl + F > smoke < that i have today smoked 7 cig. :o. if count in normal filter cigarettes, then its 4 cig maybe. so i smoke less nowadays. harashoo clap clap clap. need to celebrate this with smoke. ------>

20:48 - and my rollings are very thin. its like a half cigarette. and often i smoke just half. especially in evenings. in work i smoke whole because there its more like social situation, so easily will smoke whole without that notice. + because there i get smoke every 2 hour just. krahaaa... 

20:49 - i continue reading. im a freak today :P reaaaaaaaaaad read read read. 

20:55 - need to change bed sheets
21:14 - better go already brush teeth, because later im too tired.
21:17 - done, hair also brushed. and i can breath dot com. almost choked in my own spit :D *cough cough*

21:22 - idk anymore what i read. i only read the text but dont understand it. maybe i begin to be tired :o. last smoke now and soon sleep

21:29 - hoppaheijjaa hoppaheijjaa. i had to write this because i just said it really xD when came in from balcony.

21:41 sleeeeeeep. and i publish this text now. gn.

.

. dot dot dot. i was not in work today because knee is strange and heavy. maybe its stressed of all stairs running and jumping. better let it rest today , so it dont get worse, and infect. 

cleaned here today + washed floors. next need to shower and then to shop. my work end soon, friday last day. then need to seek new work place. eczema is problem in current work, so we end the contract. reason is because its too sporty work, and when sweat, skin itch, and then i scratch it to bloods. 

sweating + atopic eczema not good friends. if i dont get new work before next monday, i go back for some while to ex workplace to sit and think what next. but i cant be long there, so need fast get some work. today in job-hunting website i found some potential work, and i sent email to them with a few question. if questions gets good answers from my opinion, maybe i can think on that work and ask if i get the place. surely that place go fast.. but i try atleast.

last days have been interesting because of usa election. interesting to see what trump will do. hmhm..  im interested but at the same time scared. (because of europe situation), and what putin will do. etc.. many horror scenarios i have in mind. and ofcourse other ppl too.

average temperature been for +1 week -10 c, and snow. battery in telephone end fast because news spam every minute something about trump.  i have news application in tlph.

i have lately dreamed little bit about ip 7. but still it will be too big for my hand so nah..
better keep this small iphone. i dont like big telephones which need to hold with 2 hands.

i miss old nokia times :))). today all telephones are 100% same. boring. nothing unigue..

actually i miss 1990's. then was real actions, and not boring like now, ppl just sit and watch screen from morning to evening. and then come black eyebags because of it :D

i bought public Ip to my internet. now dont need vpn anymore because now my IP is static. before it was dynamic. i pay for this new ip 2 euro per month. now can play games without much lags + stream. vpn ate always over half of my net speed. was so annoying. even paks had better net than me then. also italic problem is gone. and nat problem. and no more blackbox. haa-haa... :) #happy.

its snowing outside now. 1 week ago when was -4c and cold was raising, i took flowers in because i was sure they will finally die. but lol they died immediately when i took them in. they didnt like my rooms 22c temperature. i killed them -.- but yeye, they would anyway die now when very cold temps came. very long they lived anyway. from end of the july to beginning of november :D r.i.p. 

soon is christmas trallalaaa.. cold weathers + snow only stronger remind me of christmas. need soon waste poor moneys for christmas gifts -.- but my family knows that i dont have much money, so they dont expect anything expensive from me :)

17:37. käyn röökil--->

always after smoke i dont know anymore what to write. can be when i stand on the balcony and watch ppl who walk past on the streets or cars who drive. then mood somehow change and the writing toughts. and i forget what i was thinking etc. kriaaah. 
now need to write shopping list. bread anyway need for work tomorrow. i make always 2 sandwich for work. but sometimes i dont eat the both. and then it fly to trash. im bad human :)). jooh heippa.

nom nom

eating mincedmeat soup. or, rest of it. 3 day it lasted, because i made so much. even i fed of it my cousin girl too :D. (sure we ate other foods too).  she + her son's visited kajaani now in weekend. but they didnt sleep in my room cuz no space. they slept at my uncle's house. good weekend was :)

today work continued again. we shared foods to centrum area today. i dont yet know what area tomorrow. i hope for teppana. or ok, i dont mind. we actually got early finished today, but sure my legs are hurt now. fitness went down during holiday :D.

i go soon to shop to buy cheese and other random things, when this hair is dryed enough.
aa, shampoo need also remember to buy.  sec need hurry write up in paper piece or i forget.


why i write in paper piece when can write in phone?, because im old fashioned ofcourseeee.
also i have an app in phone for my bonus purchases. and that application remember all my lately purchased foods (it update automatically as i use bonus card at store). and there is possible to make shopping list, by ticking each foods on/off. but still im so old fashioned that i prefer to write simply on paper piece and walk with it in the shop. heh..

in morning was problems to get bisycle lock open because in night rained, then it got frozen. and lock was frozen. in panic i with full power bended the lock numbers to all directions some time. then finally got :D and brakes + gears were frozen. hard this life when is cold...
i should bring bisycle in to basement, but annoying to bring it down the stairs and up. and down in basement need to open annoying heavy and big door. its bomb shelter door. because our bikes are there in bomb shelter at winter times.

tipsu nobo started her heat again. she had few days pause and now start again. and its now 3rd heat for this autumn. i need to cover bed + sofa with all possible stuff for time when im not home here watching her, so that she dont mark the places with pee. that Get off spray dont keep her away, i noticed. 2 first days she hated that spray smell. but in 3rd day she didnt anymore care of it, and tried to do her bad things again but i got stopped early enough :D only choice is then to put all possible things on sofa + bed then, then she have not space to go there. i dont want to castrate her because castrated cats get easier sicknesses + need buy special foods to them. become more expensiver just, with all the vet visits + special food purchases.. also castrated cats become lazier and begin to eat more food. i want that tipsu keep thin, + wild + crazy and playful like a kitty.

need to think what else i need from shop. hei.

good evening

i have wasted todays day just for sleeping and keeping calm and reading forums or chatting with ppl. some strange symptoms today. heart beating heavily. tiredness. dizziness, and i slept day nap to try fix this. but didnt help. and now in evening when i drank 1 cup coffee, i got almost like a panic attack after it. heavy breathing, dizziness. idk if i have just some burnout or then just stressed. yesterday i was very energetic and did many thing. maybe it revenges now. and i slept too short night.

phaah.. i googled to me all possible diagnoses already. heart attack, hypoparathyroidism, menopause :D:D, cancer, and what other.. i forgot. but anyway :D. 

10 min ago i was outside smoking with a guy from my ex work, who came to meet me with their friends. he was driver for his friends and they were very drunk. just on street near my yard smoked and chatted for 10 min. this little bit helped to feel better. maybe i just needed walk a bit in fresh air. would be better if i go walk longer trip to park, but now in weekend evening its bad idea because drunk ppl everywhere. somehow i dont feel safe in kajaani city in weekend evenings. if alone walk. or np if walk in public areas, but if walk in dark parks, then i dont feel safe. + now in finland is a clown epidemia. clowns frightening ppls everywhere in finland last 1 week now. this epidemia came from usa.

haha.. and now was it.. yesterday or 2 days ago, here in kajaani was a 2 clown boys trying to scare ppl. but then there appeard 3-4 girls. but they werent afraid of this clowns, so they started to hunt these clowns :D:D:DD::D boys in panic escaped to theirs homes, and then the girls called police. and police took the clowns. in other places in finland that clowns scared ppl and some of them had tools on hands. 1 clown had chainsaw :S. and small kids met these clowns. was big news in iltasanomat about this. poor kids.

in sweden some clown already killed someone in street. we live sick times.
this epidemia comes of some clown horror movie, seem like that.

kello is 22:36. im waiting that the butter is melting. so i will make sandwich and cook rooibos tea with ginger and lemon taste. i had no energy to even cook today. i only ate some random food pieces from fridge. well. i will make tomorrow mincedmeat soup then.

tipsu is atm digging dry food pellets of a box. i created "active toy" to her, of a box, where i added empty toiletpaper rolls. and then i poured dryfoods in the paperrolls to bottom. so she has to dig them up by hard work :D im evil >:D but cats likes to hunt the food, and play with it. sometimes if i throw to her a ham piece of my sandwich., she just play with it and throw it everywhere with her paw. fool cat. and then in the end she dont even eat it -.-

first she begg for it that i must give. then she just play and leave it there. pfff.
she do same thing with mouses. in norway she manytimes brought some type of mouse in to my room and bragged to me about it "mom look what i found". then when i say   jååå good cat clap clap clap. and continue my things. then she just start to play with it and then leave it there and dont even eat it. what a cat -.-. and then i must with paper carefully bring the mouse out. and wash hands 10 times after it with all possible poisons :P arsenikk etc.

today i have taken much magnesium (and calsium in balance) because heart beating heavily and pulse rising how it wants. im happy that i ever met magnesium, i would already be in the grave if didnt ever meet it and take it. kroooh. 

asthma medicine and magnesium is the importants medicine/mineral which i simply cant live without. 

farming simulator 2017 released 25th october. i have somehow played it, but cant play much, because graphic card is over heating. for example if i watch too long time at wheat field, (in wheat is so much pixlers), so graphic card gets totally crazy and temperature rise to 80+ celsius. my graphic card will die if reach 90 celsius. so i follow temperature accurated from a small program called Speccy. there can see temperatures to all things of pc.

i tried to put bad graphics in game, smallest resolution etc settings, but graphic card didnt care of it. still temperature rised and made much noise. hmh. in that game is too nice horizon and graphics just.

i have had problems with my sofa lately , thx to tipsu. she was on the heat, and she marked places here with piss. and she peed small amount in middle of sofa too. then i in panic washed the area with soda/bicarb + water. cuz i read somehwere in forums that with soda is good to wash piss away of textils or sofa. but my sofa textile didnt like it. color became whiter of it :S. so today i took a pen and with it recolored the whitened areas :D::DD result became very good actually. and i with wet rag little scrub the pen color lighter, so it looks possible balanced color with other area in sofa. 

also i keep a big rag on sofa where i spray Get off -spray. its supposed to make cat keep distance to that place. they dont like that smell. i for fun put cat on the rag where i sprayed it, her face became so fun, a wry face. :P wry, grin, grimace. idk which of them is the correct word. ok nvm.

here snowed 2 days on a row yesterday and before yesterday. today is only raining and is warm, +5c. and snows gone. winter lasted just 2 days. and my flowers happily still alive, and very big now. and growing growing and not afraid of cold. many nights been minus celsius , but they dont care. strange flowers i have o.O maybe they are wearing winter clothes on them, cuz/coz they dont seem to freeze. tsihiii...>:D. 2 days ago when was cold + snowing, i gave water to flowers, so of flowers raised fog :o. the ground were frozen. and other flower which is at balcony fence, was covered totally of snow. but the flower didnt care. kriaaah.. 

legs are itching. i bought 200g chokolate plate yesterday for certain reason. and i have eaten half of it. and now itch everywhere. sugar sugar.. tsk ..

sec need scratch legs. and maybe roll a smoke too and brb smoke. ok brb.

huh it helped. now can continue this wonderful life again. but hmms. i feel hungry a bit so i go cook tea with coffeemachine and make 1-2 sandwich. then happily eat them and read some forums. amen and hei.

1st vacation day

and idk how to spend it. i went early sleep yesterday because tired. me and mother visited marika for coffee and mother + me was eating outside, etc etc.

today i woke early in human times. cleaned room. but didnt vacuum clean. that can wait for inspiration. time is now 14:48. been in shower. now cookin tea. also i sent a msg to 1 guy, what he is doing. but no reply yet. i try to invite him here to make some food with me. but hmmm. if he dont answer, np. i can spend this day by my self and play games and chill. hehh.. 

i pre-ordered fs17. costed 34 USD. not so expensive. 25th october they release it. jeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee :)))))))
i will try it with this pc, but if will not run, then need faster get moneys for graphic card -.-

today i have mostly just layed in sofa or bed and surfed with phone. yes and chatted in gameranger with Yu.GoD Dragonfire. about travelling things.

in my right hand is cotton glove. because i just put bemetson to hands + feet.

aa, and i was again on neurosonic chair yesterday. but i took 11 minutes program just because i wanted fast home just :D also i took new magnet behind left ear. last magnet falled again off in 5th day of putting.

now i go get the tea. and drink it and watch this screen with empty brain and maybe try to plan what i want to do today. aa, and no, im not tea drinker 100%. nowadays i drink coffee in mornings and days, and in evenings tea. but today i want tea suddenly at this clocktime too. njams.

im restless

while waiting for mother, so better waste time by writing here some sentences.
she is somewhere shopping and when finished, coming to get me and we go eat pizza.
i ate yesterday too but njet problem njet problem. today started holiday. should have started tomorrow, but my work partner will not be at work tomorrow, so i too dont need to be. and i called to my boss and asked what i do tomorrow then. he said i can start the holiday already today :) yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee........   31st october work continues again.

no intress to cook today so i called to mother and asked if she want to go eat with me.
legs are little hurt of stairs running to customers. and left foot (foot table) is somehow sprained a bit. maybe because suddenly need run in stairs so much, then feet are in shock :))

this far i have driven with car and all was nice + good. then i have delivered foods alone while work team was driving just, etc. we use to change roles when feel so. other drive, other bring foods. well, but i have got driven 1 time just sofar. anyway, she said that after holiday i must do both works, drive + bring foods, and she will just sit in car and "support" :D this will be hard... double more energy will be wasted then. focus in driving, then yet need run stairs up. jååh..  i already now notice i have got better fitness, i dont anymore get so tired in stairs running, or with bisycling. 

after 5 mins mother should come. she sais she will go to some second hand shop, and it will close now after 5 mins. then she come. and we go to abc to eat. its our favourite place, because its big, there is good light, and much space to sit. i dont like small restaurants where ppls are so close. + air is bad. in big restaurants can more relax, and there dare to sit long times without that nobody wonder. sad that abc is not anymore open in night times like before. propably not enough paying customers at night times, too expensive to keep it open then. big space.. waste a lot of electricity. only teens + drunkards use to go there at night times. and they dont have money :D they only go sit there to relax and meet friends. and make noise and disturb others. i think its 1 reason too why they close it for night. 

finally i got new and normal stove. suddenly when i came home from work, here was new stove, and ugly old thin stove was away from here. and this new stove is normal size even. now can make normal size pizza :) and not small plate...like in old was.

time is 17:00. i go prepare now. she will call in any minute. baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaj.